I want to be a waitress when I grow up.

While I’m in the re-blogging mood also check out my friend Jessie’s new blog, she’s a talented aspiring therapist and now I found out a talented writer as well!

jessiearcand

That’s right. A waitress. At least that’s what I said in the third grade. But what better to do with a child’s dream than to squash it and tell   her to think of something different and “better” to be than a shitty, low-paid waitress? (Thank you, Ms. Ellickson.)

So I changed it to “marine biologist.” It sounded smart. And it would get the teacher off my back. I went with that for a while until I realized that I’m terrified of the sea (and the threat of tsunamis, in particular) and I fucking HATE biology.

Next idea: stand-up comedian. Again, a low-paid job with little chance of success. But I’d get to talk all day and (potentially) make people laugh. Realistic, it was not. Closer to a real yet feasible dream job? Most definitely, though I wouldn’t realize it for another sixteen years or so.

Enter junior high. No one knows…

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Thoughts from a man: Don’t make fun of a pregnant woman’s belly

Thoughts from a man: Don't make fun of a pregnant woman's belly

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Okay, so you’re probably wondering how a man knows anything about having a pregnant belly. Well, let me tell you what happened today and you be the judge 🙂

So, I have this friend, let’s call her Beth (not her real name). Beth is in her late 30s and is 4 months pregnant with her third child. She is clearly showing baby bump now. I’ll explain why that’s relevant to the story in the next paragraphs.

Occasionally Beth likes to go for an ice cream. Today she told me about earlier in the week. I wasn’t there, but she told me about when she went to get a treat at her favorite spot. Beth tells me that immediately as she enters the restaurant she sees the two men behind the counter snickering and laughing to each other.

The men who clearly look over 30 years old, covered it up but were clearly laughing at her pregnant belly. Before they took her order she could see them mouthing the words “Whoa, damn she is pregnant!” as they chuckled.

These man boys then quickly ceased their antics and tried to take her order oblivious to the fact that she saw what they did. Beth was disgusted, but she was late for work so she just paid for her ice cream and was on her way.

Beth is strong minded and might not have gone there again but she was craving the same ice cream treat again today. She thought maybe those immature man boys would not be scheduled that day and took her chances.

As she entered the restaurant for the second time that week, to her dismay it was them again. Those two stupid men that looked way too old to be working at an ice cream restaurant. They started snickering again as she walked in and under their breath she again saw the guy from before mouth the words “Damn, she is back for more!”

Again, she was offended but didn’t have the energy to say anything. Just as she thought to turn and leave they offered to take her order. Grudgingly she accepted and ordered an ice cream treat from them again. She was soon on her way.

That was today, she told me about these so-called men. I was infuriated that they would treat a pregnant woman in such an appalling way. I said to her it’s men like these that give the rest of us a bad name, they don’t even deserve the title of men, their a stupid boy in a man’s body with no sense of decency.

Beth said she was upset but didn’t say anything because it was not uncommon. To my surprise this was the third time she had experienced men ridiculing her pregnant belly this week! On Monday while she was walking by a garden a construction worker snickered to his co-worker and said a similar nasty thing about her being pregnant. She asked me, “what did I do to deserve this?” I said she didn’t deserve it. She wondered if she had a sign on her head telling men to mess with her this week.

Beth kept her sense of humor and laughed it off, but I wasn’t laughing. She is a friend and it hurt me that she was hurt in this way. I could tell it affected her a lot and understandably made her not want to go to that ice cream restaurant again.

I simply had to do something. When I had some free time I marched down to the same ice cream stand to talk to the manager. I told them my name and her first name only and when she came in. I wanted to respect her privacy but still voiced my concern that two of the employees there were disrespecting her and making fun of her pregnant belly.

The manager was understanding. He didn’t match the description she gave me of the two man boys and he apologized profusely. He said that he was proud of his workers and was appalled that this happened.

He asked if she would feel comfortable coming in to talk to the manager. I explained that she was insulted and embarrassed and she didn’t want to say anything but I was speaking for her. He understood and took down my information. He assured me that he would talk to the employees working at the time and make sure it didn’t happen again.

I never did tell Beth I did this but it made me feel good. I wanted to talk about it here because women, correct me if I’m wrong but this kind of treatment to pregnant women is common and unacceptable. Those weren’t men behind the ice cream stand, they were scum to do this, but at least now they’ll know that if they do it again they won’t even be able to keep a job selling ice cream.